More Adventures in the Kitchen

Anyone who has been following this blog should have picked up by now that one of the greatest challenges I face on a regular basis living in Kenya has nothing to do with the leopard outside my door (it’s actually a serval), nor the rampant corruption, nor the lack of motivation, but instead is found in the kitchen (and not coincidentally not in my stomach): FOOD! I am a terrible cook, and was never forced through the last-few-years-of-college-living-on-my-own-need-to-learn-to-cook period of life that many people my age have been subjected to (incidentally, I have noticed a love for hyphenated descriptors and ending sentences with prepositions; Missler and Vosburgh tear me a new one), and thus never learned to cook even simple things. Don’t get me wrong, I am not so rock-bottom as to be unable to whip up a delicious packet of ramen or whatnot, but beyond pre-prepared food, I am sorely lacking.

Hence my “Adventures in the Kitchen,” series, which may or may not have been going by a different title (or several) in other blog posts. No matter, they shall henceforth be known as “Adventures in the Kitchen,” possibly with funny tack-ons and slight adjustments (think: “Chicken Soup…” series of books). For the latest adventures, continue reading!

I started a grease fire! Doesn’t that scream adventure?! I was thankfully allowed to enjoy the humor of the situation much more than if I had been in America, where instead of laughing while my pot explodes, I would have been fretting about ADT or Brinks or any other home security system would have been blasting some alarm and sending over some overpriced duty police, only to have my next months bill itself explode due to a false alarm. False alarms are funny people. It’s like a false positive on a TB test. “You have TB. Wait, no you don’t. Just kidding.” I successfully smothered the grease fire (which was actually an oil fire… who knew heating up oil caused it to ignite?) and continued cooking. Fun times!

I am also becoming quite the pro at cooking stir fry. I have had about 10 screw ups and 1 success on about 6 attempts. When I screw up, I screw up bad. Haven’t died though. Stomach hasn’t been happy for about 2 months though either. The only adjustment I would make to the last recipe, my only success, is that I don’t need so much sauce for one person. Also, ginger and cumin are good complements for one another? Did anyone else know that? I didn’t?

And my final update involves eggs. Medical did a pretty good job of scaring me away from eggs. Seemed like every one I cracked open was going to contain a chick. This is not actually the case, and if you add Mchuzi mix (the name of some random soy sauce and other stuff mixed together and put in everything) to the eggs it’s actually quite delicious. Though usually i must wait until the next hour to judge the complete effect of a “successful,” meal, so a future update might have me recanting my first success with eggs. Such is life. I deal. Maybe I’ll get a pet chicken out of my new found fondness for the incredible edible egg, but until then, I’m gonna keep eating them.

Besides, if I get a chick out of one of them, then I can make my own eggs! Chickens are practically egg factories! Did you know that? It’s amazing! They’re like the rabbits of the egg world!



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5 responses to “More Adventures in the Kitchen

  1. kim

    My suggestion. Eat out! Your only in Kenya for a short amount of time, enjoy the cuisine!

  2. Austin

    So what’s your lifetime grease fire count up to now? Hahahaha I actually told the story of your first fire the other day. Enjoyed by all around.

    Hang in there; there’s always eating out!

  3. Jon,

    Take it from me and do NOT get a hen. I got one and her eggs keep being snatched by the eagles!!!

    Karibu Kenya!!


  4. Elyse

    Try not to explode while you’re in Africa. Have you considered an all raw foods diet? 😛

  5. Owen

    I was trying to think of witty titles hinting at culinary despair and disaster — Chicken Soup for the Floor? Ooh ooh, The Joy of Choking!

    Anyways, sorry we didn’t haul you (kicking and screaming for meat products) to the Freeman stir fries while we had the chance.